I have a dear friend who is about to go to Rwanda for a few weeks to work with refugees and she sent me this quote. It was so good I had to share.
"Sometimes I would like to ask God why he allows poverty, suffering and injustice when He could do something about it.
Well, why don't you ask him?
Because I am afraid he would ask me the same question."
-Anonymous
So, what are you doing to help those around you today?
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Questions
I gave a speech over Labor Day weekend, and it focused on 4 questions I have been thinking about. Here are the four questions and a bit of my notes. Any thoughts? Leave me a comment.
1. Why do we continue to live in our world rather than moving into the world of other people?
2. Why do we fear when we should lead?
There is a perceived danger in loving each other. Actually, there is a real danger in loving each other. We start loving other people and our lives become messy.
3. Why do we react when we should choose?
I am a part of a generation of privileged, angst-filled former church-goers, and we are searching for something real that actually resonates with the deep desire of our souls to be connected. At our worst, we travel on our parents dime to remote areas of the globe searching for some sort of purpose while trying to work out our issues through “serving” the poor, returning adorned with strange jewelry, judging every friend and family member for their lifestyles but not changing anything about ourselves. Good leaders seem to not simply react to the situations around them, they choose how they are going to be and then they are consistent in being that way. Not tossed by the wind. So at our best, my generation embraces the tension of living in a global society, and then we dig our heels into figuring out who God created us to be and confidently living into that the fullest that we can, using all the energy and passion of the world.
"If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself that you are not poet enough to call forth its riches; for the Creator, there is no poverty and no indifferent place."
Rainier Maria Rilke
4. Why do we repeat when we should change?
What inter-generational relationships have taught me:
Given me perspective
Taught me not to fear
Shown me the line between prosperity and entitlement
Leaders should be changing conversations
How do I change the conversation to move into the world of others?
How do I change the conversation so I am leading instead of fearing?
How do I change the conversation to choosing instead of reacting?
1. Why do we continue to live in our world rather than moving into the world of other people?
2. Why do we fear when we should lead?
There is a perceived danger in loving each other. Actually, there is a real danger in loving each other. We start loving other people and our lives become messy.
3. Why do we react when we should choose?
I am a part of a generation of privileged, angst-filled former church-goers, and we are searching for something real that actually resonates with the deep desire of our souls to be connected. At our worst, we travel on our parents dime to remote areas of the globe searching for some sort of purpose while trying to work out our issues through “serving” the poor, returning adorned with strange jewelry, judging every friend and family member for their lifestyles but not changing anything about ourselves. Good leaders seem to not simply react to the situations around them, they choose how they are going to be and then they are consistent in being that way. Not tossed by the wind. So at our best, my generation embraces the tension of living in a global society, and then we dig our heels into figuring out who God created us to be and confidently living into that the fullest that we can, using all the energy and passion of the world.
"If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself that you are not poet enough to call forth its riches; for the Creator, there is no poverty and no indifferent place."
Rainier Maria Rilke
4. Why do we repeat when we should change?
What inter-generational relationships have taught me:
Given me perspective
Taught me not to fear
Shown me the line between prosperity and entitlement
Leaders should be changing conversations
How do I change the conversation to move into the world of others?
How do I change the conversation so I am leading instead of fearing?
How do I change the conversation to choosing instead of reacting?
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Easter and Interfaith
I spent a whirlwind 24 hours in Kirksville, Missouri this week doing a speaking gig at Truman State University. I got to be the only passenger in an 8-passenger plane, eat delicious Mexican food, and hang out with a group of amazing students from the MSA (Muslim Students Association) on campus. We spent a lot of time talking about the obstacles to doing interfaith work, and why people are so afraid to participate. I always go through a kind of inner turmoil in these conversations, because I don’t think people have anything to fear.
And it is incredibly challenging to tell someone who is afraid simply to not be, and have it make any difference.
If interfaith cooperation is really just the engagement of religious diversity to a constructive end, how can people be against that?
Because people are afraid of what they don’t know.
In the early 1960’s a Jewish rabbi by the name of Abraham Joshua Heschel heard about an African American Baptist preacher from the South by the name of Martin Luther King Jr. Rabbi Heschel was inspired by King’s action in the civil rights movement, and decided to join in. King and Heschel became good friends, and, after marching with King, Heschel said “When I marched in Selma, I felt like my feet were praying.” They were different as night and day. A Jewish rabbi from New York, and an African American Baptist preacher from Alabama. But they agreed that all lives should have equal value, and they saw the power their actions had together.
Working with people different is not about watering down what you believe or pretending you don’t think anything different than the next person, but instead respecting the fact that all lives have equal value, and that we can agree on shared values like compassion and serving others.
As a Christian, this is especially true for me. I am honestly tired of hearing from campus after campus that the Christian groups are the ones least likely to respond positively to this message. That is frustrating to me. I am a committed Christian, and I do interfaith work. Because it matters, and getting to know people who believe differently than me makes me a better Christian because I have to articulate what I believe and why, and see if those statements make any difference about the way I live my life. And I really think Jesus was/would be now surrounded by people different from him so he could listen to their stories, and love them exactly the same as he would with people who believed what he was saying and followed his teachings. I think he loved everyone. Equally.
And we should do the same. Not throw rocks at other people we probably just haven’t taken the time to understand, but instead be brave enough to respect each other and form friendships.
It is Easter weekend. A time Christians remember Jesus’ sacrifice for us all. Sounds like as good of a time as any to love other people…since that is what Jesus was doing.
Am I right?
And it is incredibly challenging to tell someone who is afraid simply to not be, and have it make any difference.
If interfaith cooperation is really just the engagement of religious diversity to a constructive end, how can people be against that?
Because people are afraid of what they don’t know.
In the early 1960’s a Jewish rabbi by the name of Abraham Joshua Heschel heard about an African American Baptist preacher from the South by the name of Martin Luther King Jr. Rabbi Heschel was inspired by King’s action in the civil rights movement, and decided to join in. King and Heschel became good friends, and, after marching with King, Heschel said “When I marched in Selma, I felt like my feet were praying.” They were different as night and day. A Jewish rabbi from New York, and an African American Baptist preacher from Alabama. But they agreed that all lives should have equal value, and they saw the power their actions had together.
Working with people different is not about watering down what you believe or pretending you don’t think anything different than the next person, but instead respecting the fact that all lives have equal value, and that we can agree on shared values like compassion and serving others.
As a Christian, this is especially true for me. I am honestly tired of hearing from campus after campus that the Christian groups are the ones least likely to respond positively to this message. That is frustrating to me. I am a committed Christian, and I do interfaith work. Because it matters, and getting to know people who believe differently than me makes me a better Christian because I have to articulate what I believe and why, and see if those statements make any difference about the way I live my life. And I really think Jesus was/would be now surrounded by people different from him so he could listen to their stories, and love them exactly the same as he would with people who believed what he was saying and followed his teachings. I think he loved everyone. Equally.
And we should do the same. Not throw rocks at other people we probably just haven’t taken the time to understand, but instead be brave enough to respect each other and form friendships.
It is Easter weekend. A time Christians remember Jesus’ sacrifice for us all. Sounds like as good of a time as any to love other people…since that is what Jesus was doing.
Am I right?
Monday, March 28, 2011
Thomas
A few days ago, my credit card got stuck in the parking pay machine on a street in downtown Seattle. I was annoyed and called the number on the machine, and was told I needed to wait in the rain for a person to arrive and fix it. Fifteen minutes later, a man shows up who looked to be of east-Asian descent. While I proceed to apologize and tell him how my credit card had since emerged from the machine before he got there, making his trip worthless, we strike up a conversation. I find out his name is Thomas, and that he moved to Seattle from Laos 30 years ago. He told me some amazing stories about his experience when the regime changed to communist, and how his family had to flee since his father was in politics and feared for his life. They had to start over completely in the USA. He told me about his kids and his wife, how they always tease him that he still has a thick accent, and about how much he loved the rain in Seattle. It struck me as I was listening in fascination how everyday people that come in and out of my life don’t have to be random if I can just slow down. Thomas ended up paying for my parking, telling me to feel free and call their fix-it number any time I was in the area (even if the machine wasn’t broken) because that was his area and he would be happy if he could see me again. Then we said goodbye. I don’t know if I will ever see him again. But, Thomas, thanks for the reminder that there is a larger world than me and my trivial inconveniences.
I hope my credit card gets stuck again soon. Who knows who I could meet?
I hope my credit card gets stuck again soon. Who knows who I could meet?
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Date a girl who reads
I saw this today, and liked it a lot.
"Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes. She has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.
Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag.She’s the one lovingly looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly cries out when she finds the book she wants. You see the weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a second hand book shop? That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow.
She’s the girl reading while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top because she’s kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of the author’s making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if she likes the book.
Buy her another cup of coffee.
Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she says she understood James Joyce’s Ulysses she’s just saying that to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would like to be Alice.
It’s easy to date a girl who reads. Give her books for her birthday, for Christmas and for anniversaries. Give her the gift of words, in poetry, in song. Give her Neruda, Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by God, she’s going to try to make her life a little like her favorite book. It will never be your fault if she does.
She has to give it a shot somehow.
Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who understand that all things will come to end. That you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.
Why be frightened of everything that you are not? Girls who read understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the Twilight series.
If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.
You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock concert. Or very casually next time she’s sick. Over Skype.
You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn’t burst and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you shake the snow off your boots.
Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads.
Or better yet, date a girl who writes."
— Rosemary Urquico
"Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes. She has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.
Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag.She’s the one lovingly looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly cries out when she finds the book she wants. You see the weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a second hand book shop? That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow.
She’s the girl reading while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top because she’s kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of the author’s making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if she likes the book.
Buy her another cup of coffee.
Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she says she understood James Joyce’s Ulysses she’s just saying that to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would like to be Alice.
It’s easy to date a girl who reads. Give her books for her birthday, for Christmas and for anniversaries. Give her the gift of words, in poetry, in song. Give her Neruda, Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by God, she’s going to try to make her life a little like her favorite book. It will never be your fault if she does.
She has to give it a shot somehow.
Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who understand that all things will come to end. That you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.
Why be frightened of everything that you are not? Girls who read understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the Twilight series.
If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.
You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock concert. Or very casually next time she’s sick. Over Skype.
You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn’t burst and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you shake the snow off your boots.
Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads.
Or better yet, date a girl who writes."
— Rosemary Urquico
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
religious discourse
I was asked by Interfaith Youth Core to write a short blog for them about the discourse around religion in America for their new website, which is launching this week. Here is what I gave them.
I grew up in an Evangelical Christian church, and I really liked it. Even saying this sometimes makes me want to cringe, or makes me think I have to sandwich that ‘confession’ with words about how tolerant I am, about how I am not what people think, etc. Why do I have to do that? Has the civil discourse of this nation deteriorated to the point where I have to admit my faith background with hesitance out of fear of others dumping me in a box labeled “Crazy. Don’t interact with?” I remember going to Sunday school as a child, and learning a song where I grabbed my tongue and sang: “Keep your tongue from evil, and your lips from speaking lies.” It was completely silly and targeted for five year olds, but the message being conveyed was important. The song is based on a verse in the Old Testament book of Psalms, and I have been struck lately by the thought that the discourse surrounding American Evangelicals (and religion in general) is anything but “keep your tongue from evil.” Quite the contrary, actually. Christians as a religious group seem to be known for being close-minded and publicly condemning people in the name of our faith. As a result, others poke fun at us because they (rightfully so) see the blatant hypocrisy between our words of “love” and our actions of blatant rudeness. As a young Christian leader who sees the value of interfaith cooperation, I am sad to say I have often felt push-back from my own community. I am sometimes asked what the point is of working with “those other people,” whether they be Muslims, atheists, or just different denominations of Christianity. What I have come to find is, once I give “those other people” a chance, we are not that much different. Peace doesn’t have to be the world peace pipe dream out of the mouth of a ditzy beauty contestant. Instead of searching for our theological differences and hurling them in each other’s faces as proof we could never get along, what if we wrote a different story? This story involves going out of our comfort zones and risking friendship with someone of a different faith without ulterior motives, independent of the fallout. This story involves saying what we are for, instead of what we are against. This story praises the good work people are doing, instead of just pointing out the bad. This story is one I am writing with my Muslim, Sikh, Atheist, Buddhist and, yes, Evangelical Christian, friends. We are part of changing the conversation around religious discourse in America, and my life has been changed because of this story.
I grew up in an Evangelical Christian church, and I really liked it. Even saying this sometimes makes me want to cringe, or makes me think I have to sandwich that ‘confession’ with words about how tolerant I am, about how I am not what people think, etc. Why do I have to do that? Has the civil discourse of this nation deteriorated to the point where I have to admit my faith background with hesitance out of fear of others dumping me in a box labeled “Crazy. Don’t interact with?” I remember going to Sunday school as a child, and learning a song where I grabbed my tongue and sang: “Keep your tongue from evil, and your lips from speaking lies.” It was completely silly and targeted for five year olds, but the message being conveyed was important. The song is based on a verse in the Old Testament book of Psalms, and I have been struck lately by the thought that the discourse surrounding American Evangelicals (and religion in general) is anything but “keep your tongue from evil.” Quite the contrary, actually. Christians as a religious group seem to be known for being close-minded and publicly condemning people in the name of our faith. As a result, others poke fun at us because they (rightfully so) see the blatant hypocrisy between our words of “love” and our actions of blatant rudeness. As a young Christian leader who sees the value of interfaith cooperation, I am sad to say I have often felt push-back from my own community. I am sometimes asked what the point is of working with “those other people,” whether they be Muslims, atheists, or just different denominations of Christianity. What I have come to find is, once I give “those other people” a chance, we are not that much different. Peace doesn’t have to be the world peace pipe dream out of the mouth of a ditzy beauty contestant. Instead of searching for our theological differences and hurling them in each other’s faces as proof we could never get along, what if we wrote a different story? This story involves going out of our comfort zones and risking friendship with someone of a different faith without ulterior motives, independent of the fallout. This story involves saying what we are for, instead of what we are against. This story praises the good work people are doing, instead of just pointing out the bad. This story is one I am writing with my Muslim, Sikh, Atheist, Buddhist and, yes, Evangelical Christian, friends. We are part of changing the conversation around religious discourse in America, and my life has been changed because of this story.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
I am from
I am from curiosity.
From dissatisfaction in "other"
From smoke rings and quinine tablets.
From casual profanities offered
to speak words no one could seem to articulate.
I am from cool waters and dark toes
intermingling with pale white ones.
Unanswerable questions and practical optimism.
From friendship despite
thick walls generations old
between and around us.
I am from expectation
Self-imposed.
From feelings of needing to live up to
Yet desperately aching for a course distinctly my own.
From broken leaders and lost potential
And from hungry eyes asking
if there could ever be more.
I am searching
wanting to find that answer.
From dissatisfaction in "other"
From smoke rings and quinine tablets.
From casual profanities offered
to speak words no one could seem to articulate.
I am from cool waters and dark toes
intermingling with pale white ones.
Unanswerable questions and practical optimism.
From friendship despite
thick walls generations old
between and around us.
I am from expectation
Self-imposed.
From feelings of needing to live up to
Yet desperately aching for a course distinctly my own.
From broken leaders and lost potential
And from hungry eyes asking
if there could ever be more.
I am searching
wanting to find that answer.
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